May 14, 2009

Family issues!

Just after I posted a question related to family yesterday, I got a very bad news from China about my Dad's family. I don't want to go into detail about it...but it's serious and my Dad is in hospital now. (but he'll be fine).
I called my mom when I was waiting for the 9.30am yoga class just to kill time and talk to her. She said she didn't want to tell me about the situation to not worry me, but when she told me my tears just broke out from my eyes. I was angry, upset, concerned, worried and the worst thing was I could do nothing!!! I'm thousands miles away from them and when they needed me most, I could do nothing!!! I felt impotent! My mom was optimistic as always, she always sees the bright side of the situation. I love and admire her so much! She's such a strong and wise women, the role model for me.
The emotional part of me stayed for as long as the yoga class lasted (yes, I did go to the yoga class because my mom and Star told me to do so, they knew it was going to do good for me). When I walked out from the studio, my emotional part shut down and my rational part came out. What is done is done, I cannot change it. I can't help them from where I am and I know they will be happier if I just continue doing what I was doing and do it better, that's the best reward to parents. (be happy and do what I love most). But I will do something more for them (or for me), call them and talk to them more often, share what I do everyday with them, even it's as little things as what I made for dinner. Because they love hearing from me and knowing what I do and think. I always knew I should call them more than once/twice a week. But my selfish part made me not to because the more I talk to them, more I miss them and sometimes it hurts. However, I changed my mind on this, I will enjoy more time with them as long as they're alive, even it's through voice.

Okay. Recap of food (despite of the news, I did manage to eat good food. Although I didn't have much appetite, I knew I needed to eat well to be strong. Strong for me, strong for my parents, strong to be able to take care of them).
Breakfast: pumpkin flax porridge
  • 1/3 c. flax porridge
  • 1/3 c. almond breeze
  • 1/3 c. pumpkin (stir at the end)
  • 1/2 banana
  • 2 tbsp egg white
  • vanilla/cinnamon
  • topped with 1/4 c. mixgranola and Cinnamon Swirl PB
Lunch: using the pantry. Packed udon noodles to which I add the leftover mushroom medley and baby spinachDessert: tea and chocolatesLook what I got later: four boxes of holey donuts!!! I won a contest from An Apple A Day, who always hold amazing giveaways!
Needless to say that PM snack was a donutI haven't had donuts for a long long time.. and almost forgot how a donut tastes like. But this one is really good!!!
To balance out I had some gigantic strawberries
Then I did some baking. Another cheesecake. This time I used cottage cheese instead of ricotta cheese, silken tofu instead of firm tofu and add some frozen blueberries. And I cut myself when I was cutting it
Dinner was a sauteed cucumber with mushroom and smoked salmon; seaweed salad and millet porridge.Dessert: dairy free chocolate pudding. (cheesecake was still warm)I know that every family has its own problems and it's not easy to get rid of it.
Question: How do you deal with family problems (not only you and your parents, but also all the relatives)? Are you the one that prefers to stay away from it or you are the active person that try to solve the problem?


TheBoyfriend1124 said...

Your mother has very good attitude of life. Optimistic was wonderful for having a happy life. Sometimes we cann't change our situation, but we can change our feeling. Be positve it will helpful for the health also will helpful for dealing the trouble......

Krista said...

Holey Donuts, indeed. WOW!

I have never tried to saute a cucumber. Does it chang ethe taste much?

I am fortunate in that I haven't had any family crisis' to deal with yet, but I would like to think that because we all live close that I would be a positive influence.

Anonymous said...

Hugs and good thoughts for you and your family right now.

Pearl said...

i'm glad that your mother is so optimistic; when there's nothing that one can do after something has happened, it's just better to look on the brighter side of things. :)

Anonymous said...

oh my holey!! those donuts look INcredible. you lucky girl!

your precious family is in my thoughts, coco. i hope you can keep your chin up through this time. even though geographically you are far from them, remember there is noone closer to you than family.

janetha said...

awh coco i am hoping your family is, you will pull through this. you have a great attitude and you are STRONG!

eek sorry about the cut, hop it was not too bad.. hey what is this cheesecake recipe? you may have posted it before but i missed it. looks really good!

and holey donuts! that is a lot of donuts for such a little lady, i have read their website they sound like good donuts. have fun enjoying them :)


The Dainty Pig said...

I wish you all the best with your family, Coco. Your mother does seem to have a really great attitude: optimism is the best medicine.
Just keep your mind and body healthy, and you'll be able to manage anything that comes your way: yoga and your wonderful healthy eats are perfect!
(your lunch soup, and the cake look amazing!).

annie said...

sorry to hear about your family situation! for me personally, i don't do anything because then it becomes this whole thing of which side you're choosing and it gets all crazy!

by the way, those donuts are lookin SOO DELISH!

Maggie said...

your mom sounds like a great role model. i hope everything will be okay!

A Toronto girl out West said...

Oh Coco - I'm so sorry you're going through a rought patch. I'm sorry about your family crisis.

You're in my prayers - all of you!!

Gina said...

So sorry to hear about your father. He needs to read your blog and become inspired by his wonderful daughter!

I made your dairy free pudding yesterday and I was wondering how you get your so smooth. Mine is always so gritty, but yours looks so smooth, what's your secret??

To deal with family problems I have found that just being there (mentally, emotionally) for them is the best. I used to give my opinions but it often back fires. Just show them your support and let them know you care and love them!

Alison said...

I'm sorry to hear about your dad. I hope he gets well soon. It's nice of your family to encourage you to keep going. You must have a supportive family.
I haven't had any family crises really. My parents generally keep their problems to themselves, as do my grandparents. My grandpa was in the ICU for a few days last year and we didn't find out about it for weeks.
Good looking food.
Again, wish you the best.

Rachel said...

You and your family will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers.

I've heard amazing things about those holey donuts - enjoy them! They look delicious.

For me, dealing with family problems involves staying connected, in touch, and aware of the situation to prevent needless worrying or jumping to conclusions. Wishing you the best!


Sweta said...

Hope your dad is feeling much better by now.Take care of yourself too!

Anonymous said...

I like your mother's attitude. She's is one fine lady! And I'm so sorry about your dad...that must truly suck.
I'm pretty active always in whatever problem I face. but I haven't yet had much of a family crisis yet like yours!
My thoughts are with you...

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